Almost Time

I am a walking talking bacterial infection

I am a secular humanist

I am a militant anti theist

I am an existential nihilist

I am depressed
I am unmotivated
I am tired

I am cold and heartless

I am short 

I am ugly

I am over weight

I am a hypocrite

I am a liar

I am one who lacks empathy

I am one who has no friends

I am made of cells that are breaking down as time passes

I am going to rot in the ground 

I am going to be forgotten

I am never going to make a significant impact in anyones life or on the world

I am a slave to the material world

I am a slave to consumerism

I am unloved by a significant other

I am unable to love a significant other

I am a slave to my unconscious mind

I am bound to the revolving descending spiral of time

I am trivial

I am meaningless
I am useless
I Am Jack's Raging Bile Duct 
I Am Jack's Cold Sweat 
I Am Jack's Complete Lack of Surprise 
I Am Jack's Inflamed Sense of Rejection 
I Am Jack's Smirking Revenge 
I Am Jack's Broken Heart

I am just a statistic, but i want something more
I am not a unique and beautiful snowflake
I am the same decaying organic matter as everything else
I am part of the same compost heap
I am the all singing all dancing crap of the world

Maybe Self Improvement isn't the answer

Maybe Self Destruction is the key

It's hard finding a reason to motivate myself nowadays, what with me thinking about death all the time. and i mean ALL the fucking time. For example I'm on the bus home myself with some piano music buzzing in my ear and i notice a pretty young woman next to me peering through the glass. I think oh she's beautiful but then out of fucking nowhere, i think to myself, oh poor girl those looks aren't gonna last forever, maggots are going to enjoy burrowing through your delicate cheekbones. Then i think fuck why am i back here again and so i spend the rest of time on the bus home wondering which part of my body the maggots will target first. LOL FUCK YOU MAGGOTS I'M GETTING CREMATED FOR SURE.

Last Friday I met up with Nathan Chi and Lewis and Tranvinh and Jordan to play some computer games at Burwood. I got there a few hours early so i finished off reading Fight Club inside Hungry Jacks while leeching wifi. I haven't been uni in weeks, except for that one time i went to kick ass in a debate. But meh played some games then just Nathan Chi and Lewis were still around. Oh and i finished Animal Farm (fuck i love reading sometimes).

Anyway we wasted the night away chatting about the most retarded topics such as Chi's glasses festish, whether any of us would ever get a girl (HA) and then religion came up again. Sometime later Nathan asked Chi hey man have you actually read the entire bible?. Chi answered, well of course not, we only pick out the parts we want to read. GODDAMN IT I WANTED TO BITCH SLAP HIM RIGHT ACROSS THE FACE for being such a bloody cherry picking faggot idiot retard shit. Fucking HELL but i managed to restrain myself and not tell him that.. for now....


In other news ... i've jumped from drawing and playing guitar to reading (this frequent jumping of hobbies does not bode well for my future working life) ... Oh yeah Lewis gave me a quick tip on how to sew a hole in my trousers, went home and tried it and thought OH MY GOSH IT WORKED wait shit i used the wrong colour thread. Isn't this just pitiful?

Meeting up and hanging around with Ella Nathan and Lewis today has pushed a temporary stopper into the hole in my brain that worries about how many people i've ceased to interact with and the limited number of friends i have. I still think that i should be ok with a few close friends than a thousand acquaintances. People like Apollo look at me and laugh at me and think i'm stupid for choosing to fight against theism and organised religion. They laugh at me and say its hilarious that i'm obsessed religion. Yes i am obsessed you materialistic fucks, i am obsessed with seeing its destruction, although i do not expect it to happen in my lifetime. They do not seem to realise that Religion is POISON that infects young vulnerable minds and seeks to control our governments and its laws and protocols and our very LIVES, all the while looking forward GLEEFULLY to the destruction of the human race. Its now a fight between fundamentalists and anti theists and i can do nothing except stand on the sidelines and hope for the purging of the human race from this ghastly totalitarian fate.

Religious Oppression. It's all around us and its all around me in my fucking house. Every fucking day. Take yesterday for example. My parents are now aware of my anti religious stance but are not yet quite aware of the extent of my uncontainable HATRED for them. They bugged me for a good 2 hours about which charities i wanted to support. I told them look you know that i have totally different views and to make sure no offence is taken here i won't answer. I don't mind which charities you support. 

Then the question changed to what i thought of Mother Teresa. FUCKING HELL i TRY not to get into these arguments but they YELL and BITCH all the long asking for an opinion when i just know they are trying to provoke me and start shit going. After much bickering and demanding for a response i said well i don't like her because she cared more about converting the poor than actually taking care of them and went on to describe how Mother Teresa accepted illegally acquired money from corrupt politicians and sent the majority of the money to the Vatican Fund.

There was a moment of silence then lo behold ANOTHER shitstorm brew up, with phrases hurled at me that ran along the lines of

"Can't you ever NOT be offensive?"

" You benefit off this family and what we believe in!!"

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you!!"

" You are going to Hell for that!!!"

WELL FUCKING HELL I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T WANT TO GIVE MY OPINION SO I SAID I WOULD KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT. DON'T FUCKING ASK ME FOR MY OPINION THEN TELL ME TO SHUT UP YOU RETARDED FUCKS

I want to slit their fucking THROATS and prop their HEADS upwards and DANCE IN THE HIGHLY PRESSURED JET OF BLOOD THAT PUNCTURES THE ROOF OF THE HOUSE AND CREATES A CRIMSON RAINFALL

I don't think i can put up with this religiously oppressive shit anymore

While i try my best not to be a sexist most of the time, (note: "MOST of the time") I often find myself thinking the mostly terrible and depraved thoughts. For example, Chi said that the girl he had been admiring at university was walking a bit funny that morning. Immediately i thought HA she must have getting some pretty rough anal last night. But then right after i thought, shit why did i think of that. I try my best not to be such a misogynistic bastard but i guess it can't be helped. I mean there were no women in the immediate vicinity to hear me say this and the girl in question definitely wasn't affected in any way that i can conceive of so i think that while this is obviously quite a bad thing to say, no one got hurt? But then theres all this shit about reputations and stuff. Argh whatever.


In the book Fight Club, the men are asked, if there was ONE THING you wish you could have done before you died what would it be? Some answered 'paint a self portrait' or 'build a house'. I stared at this line for a few hours yet nothing sprang into mind. Only trivial thoughts such as, "get laid" or "learn to play drums" or "learn how to sing" come up. I'd definitely want to give these aforementioned ideas a go, but i sometimes get the feeling i'd just want to be remembered. 

But even that thought is disheartening. Even if you are remembered through the memory of others, these others will soon perish and your memories will have only propagated for a little longer in time. Ultimately there is no point in my existence other than to exist. Makes you want to just go out into the world right now and just do whatever the fuck you want. But as always i am a bound slave. You can only break free of those social economic and mortal chains for so long, before death grabs the chain by the end as he rattles with that ominous laugh of his and yanks you back into the pure black abyss.


But why is this question asked? What is the point of asking this question? I think the significance of asking this question is that at any moment, we homo sapiens can die at any moment and its better to have died with a goal than without none. How ironic then, that as of now i still don't have a clear answer to this question.

On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero

Dreams / Nightmares #1

So i had a dream that i was in some sort of underground facility with terrible water and lighting. People were dressed in rags and outdated clothes and all crammed into various tiny wooden cells. I can't remember the details but i do remember conspiring with the cell people to overthrow the dictator who used us daily for cruel animalistic back breaking work for planting crops or mining. Yes this dream actually felt like it spanned over several days i don't know why. Basically we had no material possessions and only the company of other inmates. Naturally we didn't see the light of day till we had to work each day and we were paid with very poor canned food which sometimes was thrown on the ground and people sometimes killed each other for food. 


Every few days the dictator would round us all up in a hall for a routine head count and usually bring more inmates in and sort them into cells. If anyone had died in the cell before they would go inside shoot them twice to confirm they were dead then drag the body out before the rest of us. I became close with a girl whose father had been shot dead in another cell for trying to eat a dead inmate, which was understandable because we had terrible food. Then the dream fast forwarded and i was running through the underground compound with a pair of stolen keys and the hand of the girl who was following me. We managed to reach the top level of the facility after what seemed like hours of running up a spiralling staircase. 


Suddenly i was driving a car recklessly with no sense of direction with the girl holding onto my arm for dear life. It became apparent to me that we were being chased by uniformed guards in their own vehicles. They began to shoot us and a shot pierced the shoulder blade of the girl with me and she screamed out in anguish. I let go of the wheel to try and put pressure on her wound but another shot rang out and exploded one of the cars tyres. I tried to grab ahold of the wheel but lost all control as the car began to swerve and then there was nothing.


We were floating then we began to fall. We had tumbled off a cliff. As the air rushed past us, i looked at the girl and she looked at me and we held each other. I closed my eyes  and waited for the inevitable. But nothing happened! I craned my neck around to look out the front of the car and there was just a dark dark abyss beneath us, cavernous and endless. 


I loosened my grip on her and stared around the car. I could feel that we were still falling but everything around us was darkness. for some weird reason we just continued embracing and i closed my eyes again and just waited. Eventually after what seemed like an infinite stretch of time there was a loud bang and i woke up

Not even gonna Bother trying to interpret this shit. But the whole time i couldn't make out any facial features on the people in my dream, not even the girls face. I just instinctively knew it was a girl but her face was a blur the whole time. Oh and its probably because i've been reading up on North Korea and how recently due to extreme poverty some people were shot dead by the government for resorting to cannibalism

    

Photographs and Literature

             

Its taken well over 10 years of saving up money, occasionally not eating, walking a home instead of bus-ing it home, squandering and hoarding in order for this collection to have grown. Here ladies and gentlemen is the source from which i draw forth my daily energy to function and motivate myself to press on with my life despite the overwhelming knowledge that I'm a insignificant dot like everyone else. The DVDs are just some extra cherries on this metallic cd case cake. Seeing as i'm no longer going to uni i've spent the last few days just sitting at home messing with my guitar, playing with my doggy, reading some literature, listening to debates and discovering new music like that of Sarah Mclachlan. But amazing as it seems i'm bored of being bored.

Today i thought well if I'm going to take photos i need a faster way to get my photos onto my laptop so off i went to the camera store to buy a USB SD card reader. It worked quite well as you can see from the pictures above. I bought along "God Is Not Great" by Christopher Hitchens to read. I had to pretend i was at uni till 5pm which meant leaving the house between 1pm and 6pm. I sat in the food court for about 3 hours straight, the sound of hungry consumers blocked out only by the solemn cello music resonating through my earphones. I spent the last 2 hours at the local library where i borrowed Animal Farm by George Orwell.

Theres nothing quite like sitting in a public area and watching the crowd slowly evolve and pulsate as people come and go through, the feeling of being alienated or as some have put it, hidden in plain sight. Yet one can't help but feel somewhat superior to those around him or her, feeling like the only person in the vicinity who understands the repercussions and consequences of being part of the never ending cycle of materialism and consumerism. But i am being hypocritical yet again, JUST LOOK AT ALL THOSE CD's. I don't think anyone will EVER achieve total enlightenment and detachment from society seeing as we've have grown up dependent on it. Fuck theres even monks with IPADS NOW. I'm totally serious.

HAHA THAT IS SOOO ME. Anyway getting on with it. I was bored of masturbating, bored of reading books and bored of listening to MUSIC, or even SLEEPING, so i decided to clean up all my photos and pack them into nice little folders on my computer. As i was sorting through them i began to wonder.. why the FUCK do i take photographs? Isn't it kind of pointless? I mean it feels good to be useful sometimes and to take photos knowing that you've captured a moment on film or in todays world, in 1's and 0's but is there really any point? 

Well as i wrestled within my mind i thought... well if people are happy in the moment then perhaps my photographs do nothing more than propagate that feeling of happiness, or anger or whatever, for perhaps just a little longer if they happen to look at them. I have folders from my trips and meet ups with K11, pictures of my dog, miscellaneous pictures of anything (nature), the pictures from Japan and much more... All these photos really do is give other people a reminder of what happened recently, but for me especially, they serve more as a solemn reminder that the past is the past and it is gone forever, never to be recovered, only to be yearned after or lost in the recesses of our minds. 

So in the end of the day, perhaps it is quite pointless to hoard pictures. But hey its something i captured with my own hands and if it serves only as an temporary incentive for others happiness as they remember the past, well then at least i've done some good. Fuck i did not get my thoughts across well with this photography thing.

Haven't you ever felt so pissed that you felt like giving someone a fucking AXE TO THE FACE? Anyway moving along with the second part of this narration. After HSC i swore that i would reeducate myself through literature. I read 1984 by George Orwell, a brilliant take on what living under a totalitarian regime would be like, much akin to todays situation in North Korea. I then went and bought 'The God Delusion' by Richard Dawkins, fuck yeah science and biology is interesting as hell, FUCK Fundamentalism. But after finishing this 2nd book i tried to get started on some classics, I pulled out Pride and Prejudice, got halfway and thought fuck it. The passion had burned out and uni was starting.

But in recent days i have felt the burning flame for literature slowly rekindling and off i went to borrow Animal Farm by George Orwell and i ordered Fight Club and American Psycho online as these books are still banned in libraries. Got theses 3 lined up and ready to go. I haven't finished reading 'God Is Not Great' by Christopher Hitchens yet because his command of the english language is Astronomical and i have to pause every few sentences to look up a word in the dictionary. Well at least my stance as an anti theist is strengthening and my vocabulary 

e   x    p    a    n    d    i    n    g.

Now that i think about it, it is impossible to say which is world is larger than the other. Its overwhelming when you compare the vast collection of literature with the world of music. no one can really say for sure which is more vast and deep. Even if the everyone in the world spontaneously combusted and died except for you, it would take several hundred lifetimes to go through every book and song in existence. How that for a scope and indication of how very small and insignificant YOU are.

AND THATS JUST THE LITERATURE AND MUSIC OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE, THINK ABOUT HOW MANY FUCKING LANGUAGES THERE ARE OH MY FREAKING GOD

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TOTALLY UNRELATED BUT AAAAWWEEESSSSOOOMMMMEEEE

10 Revised Commandments

1.Do not condemn people on the basis of their ethnicity or their color.

2.Do not ever even think of using people as private property.

3.Despise those who use violence or the threat of it in sexual relations.

4.Hide your face and weep if you dare to harm a child.

5.Do not condemn people for their inborn nature. (“Why would God create so many homosexuals, only to torture and destroy them?”)

6.Be aware that you, too, are an animal, and dependent on the web of nature. Try to think and act accordingly.

7.Do not imagine you can avoid judgment if you rob people [by lying to them] rather than with a knife.

8.Turn off that fucking cell phone.

9.Denounce all jihadists and crusaders for what they are: psychopathic criminals with ugly delusions and terrible sexual repression.

10. Reject any faith if their commandments contradict any of the above.

----- In short, don't swallow your moral code in tablet form -----

I Can Develop My Brooding Potential

Today i picked up Ella, Virginia and Kelly and drove them to Serena's house as it was her birthday!! But i had to go deliver some pipes to Fairfield and refuel the car. As i was sitting there enjoying being around the company of my fellow mammalian primates, Sang out of no where mentioned that she read my blog the other day and mentioned something along the lines of how it reminded her of her year 11 blog (or her year 11 self :/ i'm not quite sure what she actually said, i thought she was subtly laughing at how retarded my blog was LOL) and how its title was also based of a Korn song, namely "I'm Here To Stay". 


I personally thought it was awesome that this girl who i didn't know quite well but still respected her for her wit and artistic prowess and mastery of colour would even bother to read my crap and that we BOTH LOVE KORN :D. But then i realised something. While part of me wants to be 100% truthful and document what i really think here online in the form of 1's and 0's so part of my legacy will live on in the virtual world, i can't help but feel ashamed that people would bother sifting through my angst bullshit. Damn oscillating frequencies. Meh fuck it i'm going to come clean about something now. Might as well.


One year ago today, i gave up on a girl that i was madly infatuated with. Her name was Vivian ( I had no chance anyway now that i look back). As i write this i know i'm probably socially fucking myself up but hey if i'm not going to be truthful whats the point of having this blog? Anyway, now that i look back on it, i was dealing with a girl way out of my league yet probably too materialistic for my liking. If i could quote a song lyric that reflected my feelings it would be the following


"The 1st time I ever saw you
You had that far away look in your eyes
And heaven's light singed down upon you
And the whole room filled up with light"


- Slash


I shall of course now explain my analysis of these lyrics and why i thought they were significant. I caught the train with her every Friday and from the 1st day i was infatuated with her bubbly positive personality. The 'far away look' is what her gaze was like when she stared out the windows of the train on its way to Strathfield where she would change trains to get to school. I'm not quite sure if its just a figment of my imagination but i swear the 1st day Rex invited me to sit with Vivian and Vivian (there was another as well) when i walked down in the carriage light filled the via the window carriage and illuminated where she sat........OK I'M QUITE SURE MY IMAGINATION WAS JUST BEING RETARDED...(oh god why am i doing this)


But getting on with it. Last year at the same birthday e.g. Serena's, i heard a certain someone yell out that i was in love with Vivian. To this day i'm not sure whether she heard it but when i got home i was devastated. It was perhaps one of my weakest moments. Depression washed over me like a relentless tide and i went through every depressing love song i had on my mp3 and it was also the night i discovered Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, their song "Love Hurts" was my emotional stimulant for the next month or so.

Dear Reader before you laugh your ass off at how pathetic i was, please consider that it was a typical teenage moment and i must be a fool for recording this here but having met Vivian again today, i had forgotten about this incident but when i started to reminisce, the sensation was painful but not as painful as before. It was part of my growing up i guess, realising that i'd wasted a whole year yearning for the attention of one girl who probably never really cared about what i thought. It did however straighten my thoughts out. I recovered with the knowledge that it was pure infatuation and a result of electric impulses running through my brain, resulting in the creation of chemicals which i mistakenly thought was "Love". Not my proudest moment but i think its safe to say now that i've grown up a bit (I hope).


Sigh now that i've gotten that out of the way, a little something else. As i was driving some of the guys back, i couldn't help but feel somewhat proud of myself despite my lack of social relationships. Reason being was because once i had mentioned my plans to leave home forever. Immediately the guys i was driving started giving me tips and ideas and advice for the future. I've always been ridiculed for not having many friends, but i like to think that i'm picky and choosy so that in the end of the day the friendships i form are actually worthwhile, not just mere acquaintances with randoms. 


I only recently discovered that Salvation Army, a group that i've dutifully donated to for many years now has an extremely anti gay policy and i also found out that the majority of its funds actually don't go towards helping the poor but more towards the organisation itself as it is a church and uses most of its money to fund church related activities. I was so fucking pissed off that i swear from now on i will NEVER donate money to these intolerant and homophobic bastards and i will only ever donate to secular organisations.

As for my good friend Rex. If you're reading this i know that you blocked me on Facebook which is no biggy and that your reason was because you didn't want to reveal to me that you're now a devout Christian. My answer is, look i didn't become your brother just so that i could mess with you and just leave it at that. Whatever you believe as long as it makes you happy i don't care what you are. HOWEVER if i'm going to ENTIRELY TRUTHFUL as my conscious demands of me i will admit this. Whenever i find out people are religious i lose quite a large chunk of respect for them and usually this chunk is never recovered. Also while i would like to suggest that i have no problem with religion was long as people kept it to themselves, it is no doubt an impossible thing to ask of religious folk because they will ALWAYS TRY AND PUSH THEIR BELIEFS ON YOU as they believe that they are doing their moral duty.


Long story short, Rex you are still my blood brother and i will care about you BUT you will now have to live with the knowledge that to me, you are now significantly weak minded and pitiful in your choice and have lost quite a large portion of my respect for you. If you can live with the knowledge that thats what i think i'm sure we can still be friends. If not well best of luck with your newfound way of life.


- 9000 social points? (check)
Lost 1 friend? (check)
Social Ridicule? (check)

Odd

Its the strangest thing, I've been seeing a great numbers of dead animals wherever i go, especially while I'm driving on the road. The other day i walked to the shops to buy some fruit when i saw a massive bat dead on the road sprawled on its back with wings spread out on the ground. Its wingspan was about 2 freaking metres wide, no kidding. I poked it with a stick for a while and was going to take a picture of it but i had forgotten my camera so oh well. I've also seen about 10 cats that have been run over on my daily drives to Richmond and a few dogs as well. Some birds just don't jump away in time.

Not a pretty sight when you're driving along the countryside and you see a cat with its head open and its entrails lying around everywhere as a feast for the flies and vultures. Every time i see a dead animal i immediately think of my dog. While obviously this is an inhumane thought i sometimes wish that my dog would run away and be hit by a car and die instantly so that i can at least leave my house without having to fight the urge to come back and see my dog e.g. have no attachment. But instead i will spend the last of my time with him playing with him, running with him and doing whatever i can to keep his tail wagging in delight. 

We are all animals in the end aren't we? The other day my dad told me to throw away the meat that i couldn't finish that we were eating at a fancy restaurant. I said "oh maybe i'll take this back for Poncho... " Immediately there was a massive uproar of disapproval from my family and relatives. Most of their shitstorm revolved around the idea that i shouldn't be wasting such good meat on a mere animal. I answered, "Well do anyone of you people want this meat?" Naturally they said no. So i said "Well i can't finish this meat so i'll bring it back for my dog." They yelled, "How can you waste such good meat on a dog? He's just a dirty animal!"

My God that pissed me off so fucking much i screamed back and said, "YOU'RE ALL FUCKING ANIMALS TOO BUT THAT DOESNT SEEM TO BE A PROBLEM AT ALL DOES IT?". Needless to say my dad smashed the back of my head with his fist, i hit my head on the table and fuck it hurt, oh and i didn't get my slab of meat back home for Poncho.


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Theres just something so hauntingly beautiful about this wallpaper and the emotion in her eyes...

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Another thing i've realised in the last few years of my life is that every time i come back home and theres no one inside yet or whenever my family takes a long time driving back home from somewhere i find myself feverishly wishing and hoping that they've crashed and died, or been mugged or something. Every time my parents call and say we'll be home later i can't hope but desire that they crash into a tree or off a bridge and die. It's not so that i can inherit money or property, no no i don't care for it, rather i'd rather be freed from having to pretend to give a shit about them anymore. You have no idea (or maybe you do) how very emotionally draining it is to maintain different facets of personality all at once

Haven't ranted in a while

Look at these churches, a massive waste of tax payers money and construction. A nut house for nutty people who believe that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

Look at this unleavened bread wafer on the right. It is a pathetic religious symbol for a human sacrifice. Catholics actually believe that during the holy mass this wafer becomes the body of Christ. I really do not understand why they haven't drawn this blatant comparison to cannibalism. Oh sure they will turn and postulate that its only a symbolic act. But if i told you the stories of the Aztecs who devoured live hearts in a sacrificial manner everyday to make sure the sun didn't stop rising, you'd surely be APPALLED at that.  We keep on being told that religion, whatever its imperfections, at least instills morality. On every side, there is conclusive evidence that the contrary is the case and that faith causes people to be more mean, more selfish, and perhaps above all, more stupid

The Bible may, indeed does, contain a warrant for trafficking in humans, for ethnic cleansing, for slavery, for bride-price, and for indiscriminate massacre, but we are not bound by any of it because it was put together by crude, uncultured human mammals who sheep herded in 0AD. Limbo was introduced in the medieval era in order to explain where the souls of many unborn children would go to. But how incredible that in the last few years the Catholic Church has actually altered its doctrines to say oh now Limbo doesn't actually exist. How fortunate for all the families who believed that their children were in that dimension. Truly disgusting

Nothing optional—from homosexuality to adultery—is ever made punishable unless those who do the prohibiting (and exact the fierce punishment) have a repressed desire to participate. The Catholic Church is an institution worth millions that seems absolutely obsessed with sex, who you do it with, how you do it, when you do it. It's an organisation that actually bans the use of CONDOMS because they believe it is sinful. What a load of crock.

The common practice of cherry picking verses from the bible should be a clear the sign of the unreliability of the bible as a source of accurate historical fact. If you're going to pick and choose only the good things to talk about then the reliability of the bible as a legitimate source of knowledge is severely countered. For those who now turn to say Evolution is clearly God's method of creation i say this. Evolution involves an enormous amount of suffering if it is to propagate the mechanism of Natural Selection. If we are to believe that God chose this as his method of creation, we can assume that he's an absolutely horrid being.

Mother Teresa, one of the most despicable figureheads of the Catholic Church in the 1930's. She was not a friend of the poor. She was a friend of poverty. She said that suffering was a gift from God. How repugnant. She spent her life opposing the only known cure for poverty, which is the empowerment of women and the emancipation of them from a livestock version of compulsory reproduction in 3rd world countries. 













Take the risk of thinking for yourself, much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. Sure, reality would be a bit more bleak and sad but as long as you made the most of your short time in it existence it would surely be a better life than to be an abject slave to a Totalitarian Master of a Celestial North Korea. But at least in YOU CAN FUCKING DIE AND LEAVE North Korea. I cannot bring myself to accept the ludicrousy of having to believe in a Judeo-Christian God who demands us to both love and fear him, REALLY this seems like the essence of SadoMasochism. 

For the better part of 10 years i was religiously indoctrinated and was subject to mental rape yes that is what i believe religious indoctrination is, it is in its purest form a method of child rape, using frightful tactics to scare a child into submission. Having been liberated from the congregations of lunatics i find myself constantly researching counter arguements and a means to support myself if ever a debate should arise concerning my new found status as an Atheist. It is NOT another religion or form of BELIEF it is a STATE OF MIND. Give me some time to read up on the other 2 major Monotheistic Religions, namely Judaism and Islam before i rant about them as well.

Obviously i have numerous other counter topics or arguements on which i could write here but i think i've ranted enough for now. And now for a quote!

"Let’s say that the consensus is that our species, being the higher primates, Homo Sapiens, has been on the planet for at least 100,000 years, maybe more. Francis Collins says maybe 100,000. Richard Dawkins thinks maybe a quarter-of-a-million. I’ll take 100,000. In order to be a Monotheist, you have to believe that for 98,000 years, our species suffered and died, most of its children dying in childbirth, most other people having a life expectancy of about 25 years, dying of their teeth.

Famine, struggle, bitterness, war, suffering, misery, all of that for 98,000 years. Heaven watches this with complete indifference. And then 2,000 years ago, thinks “That’s enough of that. It’s time to intervene,” and the best way to do this would be by condemning someone to a human sacrifice somewhere in the less literate parts of the Middle East.

Don’t let’s appeal to the Chinese, for example, where people can read and study evidence and have a civilization. Let’s go to the desert and have another revelation there. This is nonsense. It can’t be believed by a thinking person."

- R.I.P. Christopher Hitchens, one of the most ferocious intellectual atheists to have ever lived and a most gentlemanly scholar.

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On a completely different note this is where i work during the week making box after box of coffee dispensers, stopping only to piss or drink or read a book. Very Anti Climatic i know