The rain was starting to pour down heavily. Most of the zoos visitors had already left. Only the sound of our feet and the occasional animal growl broke the pitter patter of the rain. The pergola was tucked away in a corner behind a beautiful display of exotic flowers and tall burly trees. Essentially we were hidden from the public view.
Sometime passed before i realized my head was in her lap. She was so warm. I twitched my head to look up at her face. It was her dazzling angelic face, shining down on me, contrasting so much with the dim atmosphere of the pergola, the sky having darkened during the excess rainfall. I ran my hand up her neck intending to stroke her face but stopped when i felt the chain around her neck. I squinted up at the dangling piece. It was a pendant of a butterfly, with wings boldy coloured red.
A loud crashing crack pierced the air. Like the sound of an axe smashing into the ground, the bolt struck the tree overbearing the pergola. A low creeping sound began to build up. The tree began to sway left to right, tis individual branches twitching in all directions. I yelped in fright and lept up from her bosom. She remained rooted to the ground. unmoving.
I watched as all around me a ringing sound rang through the park, animals were roaring and screaming and rattling their cages. All the shrubbery was uprooted and spinning around us. The trees branches coiled through the air like hissing snakes mixed with the ever increasing blur of brown and green. Essentially we were in the eye of the storm.
Lets get out of here i panicked. But she was still sitting firmly on the ground, only now she was staring up at me with her arms outstretched. I bent down, only to find that her arms were covered in fresh wounds and scars. Frightened i dropped her hands and stepped back in shock. Struggling to her feet, she suddenly ran towards me and threw herself in my arms. Admist the powerful roar of the storm i could hear her words
"Despite how much i love, you've only ever been a rebel from the waist down. Can you not see my agony? I'm not trying to be reborn, I'm trying to transform ... Man cannot always reap what he sows."
She planted her lips on mine and for an eternal moment i was lost. There was no spiraling wind, no flailing branches, no screaming animals, no ground beneath our feet. I could hear nothing. I could see nothing save for her warm body smothering mine, both our chests pulsating, the air around us electrified and hot.
Suddenly reality grabbed me by the neck and pulled me backwards. My love stood before me, eyes shimmering with tears, face still illuminating in the shadowy pergola and arms still shredded with bloody red lines running up and down. She heaved a sobbing sigh and took a step back. Instinctively i stepped forward, hands outstretched to grab hers.
I pulled her closely, utterly lost for words unable to think of anyway to comfort her. I felt like i had known her for a lifetime, yet i had nothing to say, i knew nothing of her suffering. As i stroked her hair i could just hear her whisper.
"This...is...my...most...vulnerable...moment"
Thats when i saw it. In the spiraling whirlwind of dark green rain, there emerged a bright red butterfly. Everything in my vision was drowned up save the head of the woman i loved and the butterfly. I watched it circle above us counterclockwise to the hurricane in which we stood, watching .... waiting. Eventually it landed on her head, wings still flapping.
She squeezed me tighter in her embrace before reaching up to pull my head down so she could whisper in my ear,
"When all of your wishes are granted, many of your dreams will be destroyed."
And with that, an almighty crashing sound rang in my ears, i fell backwards, blinded by a sudden flash of white that enveloped my eyes. Pain shot up my spine from where i landed backwards on the ground. Slowly i could make out a hazy image. And there she was, standing in front me in the white. There was no sound, no beginning or end. She began to disintegrate from head to toe, into a cloud of flapping red creatures. They flew round and round me till they worked their way up to the sky, soon at a point so far off i could barely see them.
There was a tiny "clink" sound as i felt something heavy strike my head. I was covered in bits of hair, blood, skin, leaves and earth. I reached up to pull down whatever had struck me. It was the necklace she had worn. I fingered the bloody red butterfly, feeling its texture and delicately constructed wings. With that i stood up and began to drag my heavy legs and walk on. All around me, it was white. I did not know which was left or right, whether i was up or down.
Just lost in another reality, dimension, a higher plane or lower plane i knew not. Bewildered i went on and on for days , weeks, months, years on. I never stopped walking, i knew not where i was going, whether i was actually getting anywhere or not or what had happened. All i knew was that i had to follow to where she had flown off to.
Whether i would find her again, i had not the slightest clue.
After an eon, i fell to my knees and everything went dim. Darkness covered my eyes with a heaviness that i could not bear. I gave in to the darkness and breathed no more. Before i let go i thought
Where was the pergola? Where was the rain? Where were the animals siting in their cages? What happened to her? Why did she leave? What happened to all those days spent together? Making love? Reading together? Watching the sun rise and set together? Listening to music? Touching her body? Her face? Was any of that real? Was she even real? Am I... am I even sure I am real?... A dream?.. a fading memory?....
“A scattered dream that's like a far-off memory... a far-off memory that's like a scattered dream... i want to line the pieces up... yours and mine.”
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